Began February 2010. Became official towards the end of May 2010. Still going strong today. <3
Happy 2 years lovely!:) its been an awesome triumphant year!
“I love you more today than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow!”
:-*
My sister told me a soul mate is not the person
who makes you the happiest but the one who
makes you feel the most, who conducts your heart
to bang the loudest, who can drag you giggling
with forgiveness from the cellar they locked you in.
It has always been you. You are the first
person I was afraid to sleep next to,
not because of the fear you would leave
in the night but because I didn’t want to wake up
ungracefully. In the morning, I crawled over
your lumbering chest to wash my face and pinch
my cheeks and lay myself out like a still-life
beside you. Your new girlfriend is pretty
like the cover of a cookbook. I have said her name
into the empty belly of my apartment. Forgive me.
When I feel myself falling out of love with you,
I turn the record of your laughter over, reposition
the needle. I dust the dirty living room of your affection.
I have imagined our children. Forgive me. I made up
the best parts of you. Forgive me. When you told me
to look for you on my wedding day, to pause
on the alter for the sound of your voice
before sinking myself into the pond of another
love, forgive me. I mistook it for a promise.
My attempt at an honest apology. Even if it is uncalled for.
Hello. I miss you. I wish I could have snuck into your bed this last trip especially since it was cold. I’m sure Yuji would have shrugged it off though he might have been a bit jealous. Hehe. I also wanna apologize for being sungit at times the past week. I know you’ve been seeing a side of me that is unusual, selfish, self centered and arrogant. I suppose the change of my reality is to blame. Im sure it will subside once I have settled into it. Its scary and I am uncomfortable. I dont feel secure at all and I’m afraid of failing. Im also sorry I complain a lot to you, but know that its only because you’re the one I’m with most of the time. I havent had a chance to really voice it out to others. I hope this doesn’t make you love me any less and i know that you of all people can understand me. Again I’m sorry, and I laaalaaalaaalove you my favorite.
